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Give Me Your Plunger

June 8, 2018


This week has been epic, but not really in a good way.


I’m getting ahead of myself. So, I’ve been dating this same person since March. They seemed so wicked cool at first, but I think the novelty has worn off. Maybe it’s not the novelty, so much as their niceness has disappeared, to be replaced with emotional cruelty.


Don’t get me wrong, I can be wicked hurtful too, but together we have created a nasty storm. Fast forward to the present, I had just gotten off of work and was making dinner for myself in my apartment when I heard a knock on the door…more like a severe pounding.


It was The Boyfriend. He came in, we got into a huge argument, and started yelling. I’m not proud of it, I’m especially not proud of the fact that it forced Frosty to sit in the corner, tail between his legs, whimpering. Normally, I hold my own in situations like that, but it started getting scary for both of us.


Luckily, my super sweet, nosy neighbor, Liz, came to the door. She just waltzed right in and said, “M, you need to come with me right now. My toilet is overflowing and there is nasty water filling my bathroom. Also, can I borrow your plunger real quick.” She seemed entirely oblivious to the situation, but it was like magic. The Boyfriend, you see, has a weak stomach. Just thinking about an overflowing toilet made him start gagging. Liz began describing, in disgusting detail, the water that was filling her bathroom. When I went to go get the plunger, The Boyfriend left. I tried to give it to Liz but she gave me a confused look, like I was crazy for giving her a plunger. She explained that there was no bathroom accident, but she had heard our argument and was worried about me.


That was really a wake-up call for me.  I broke up with The Boyfriend and blocked his number. But this post is dedicated to Liz, THANK YOU FOR BEING A GOOD BYSTANDER. You are amazing.


Until next time,  



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